Q. Kia, I find myself more and more being accused of being an alcoholic by my family members and some of my friends. I don’t think I am because I go to work every day and I don’t do the things I see alcoholics doing, like staggering down the street drinking all day long. How can I convince my family and friends that just because I enjoy a drink every now and then does not make me an alcoholic?
A. I suggest you take an open and honest inventory of your drinking behavior; it appears obvious that you are seeing your drinking patterns differently from what your family and friends see. And know that because a person goes to work every day and is not staggering down the street does not exempt that person from having a drinking problem or being addicted to alcohol. There are certain and very specific behaviors that are clear indicators of alcohol addiction. I suggest you google the question, ‘What are the signs and symptoms of alcoholism’; then honestly answer the question, ‘Is any one or more of those signs descriptive of my drinking behavior?’ If the answer is yes, I suggest you seek professional counseling that you can learn and accomplish the three essential steps to resolving the problem, which are #1. Recognizing the problem, #2. Admitting the problem, and #3. Accepting the problem. It is then, and only then that you can take the necessary steps to resolving the problem.
Q. How can I tell my boss that I do not appreciate his inappropriate advanced toward me without jeopardizing my job?
A. I suggest you ask for a meeting with him and tell him without apology that you are uncomfortable with his behavior and would appreciate his compliance with stopping it immediately. I would also suggest that you make it clear that you are not intimidated by having to let him know that his behavior is unappreciated and that if it continues you will be forced to take additional measures to resolve the problem. Know that you have professional as well as legal options should there be a need for further action.
Q. Kia, I am becoming depression by all the negative and unjust news reports in our country. How can I separate myself from it all, but not be ignorant of what is going on around me?
A. You might want to curb the amount of time you spend watching the news and focus more on your personal goals and desires. At the same time, it will certainly not be a waste of time to pray for the healing of our land, and for God to strengthen you in His will.
Do YOU have a question for Kia? She’d be happy to accept questions. They can be emailed to lailai1044@comcast.net with the subject line ASK KIA.
